My Past, Current & Future

Did My Personality Start When I Was Born?

Have you ever wondered why you were born?

Growing up, while facing challenges until I became a teenager, I often asked myself this question. At one time, in secret, I even asked God to take me from this earth because I thought the things I had gone through were devastating. Looking back now, I can see how dramatic I was.

This is why I want to speak about why we were born from the very beginning. My hope is that through this series, you will begin to discover who you are in life. You may be just beginning your journey from young adulthood into adulthood. Sometimes, we simply have not seen the answers we are searching for.

We are all born for a purpose. We were created in God's image.

Genesis 1:27 – “So God created man in His own image; in the image and likeness of God He created him; male and female He created them.”

Growing up as an extreme introvert in a Christian home, I kept to myself. I still had no clue why I was born. I was just there.

In this first series of Why I Was Born, I want to take you down memory lane, sharing my life experiences in the hope that you will reflect on your own story. You may not get every answer in these four series, but through my journey, I pray you begin to see glimpses of your own purpose.

The Good Baby: The Beginnings of My Personality

Growing up, I was very shy and quiet. Family and friends would say to my mother, “Something must be wrong with your children.” But my mom always responded confidently, “There is nothing wrong with my children. They are quiet, well-behaved, and different.”

As a baby, I rarely cried. My mom shared that I would cry only for my bottle, then close my eyes while drinking, with little eye contact or interaction. I was content to feed and go back to sleep. Other mothers she knew were exhausted, up all night with crying babies, catching naps whenever possible. But my mom’s experience was different. She slept through the night, kept her home spotless, and even had time for herself.

The only thing she wanted was more time to play and connect with her baby. She would try to keep me awake, but I wanted to sleep, eat, and be left alone. This continued into my teenage years. She admitted that sometimes she would check on me to make sure I was breathing, even shaking me gently to see if I would move. Once, she even plucked my arm. When she told me this story years later, we laughed together about it.

I share this because I believe our story begins from the moment we are born. We are assigned to our parents for a reason. Sometimes that raises difficult questions:

• Why was I assigned to parents who struggled with addiction?

• Why was I given a father who hurt me?

• Why was I born to a mother who never showed me love?
  

These are deep questions to ask God.

I have read books about pregnancy and the stages a baby goes through in the womb. What a mother feeds her body, what she speaks, and how she cares for herself all impact her child’s development.

The Obedient Baby: It Was in Me

Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV) – “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

My mom wasn’t living a Christian life at the time, but she raised me the best way she knew how. Her own relationship with her mother was painful — her mother abandoned her — and she wanted something different for me. Without realizing it, she was breaking a generational curse.

I made life easy for her as a first-time mom. She gave me love, set boundaries, and provided safety. If I touched something I shouldn’t, she only had to tell me once. If I tried again, she gave me a look that meant “don’t do it,” and I listened.

My obedience brought her joy and relief, especially as a single mother trying to make ends meet. Already, I can see how my personality, even as a baby, impacted her life.

The Slow-to-Warm-Up

My mom has always been protective, like a lioness. She was careful about who she let around me. Because I was quiet and reserved, she didn’t just trust anyone to care for me.

As a child, I was what they call “slow to warm up.” Some babies are friendly and smile at everyone. That was not me. I clung to my mom and cried when left somewhere unfamiliar. Even after the crying stopped, I stayed quiet and kept to myself. It took me a long time to feel comfortable around others.

My mom would sometimes stand by the door, waiting until I calmed down.

That personality trait carried into my relationships. Being slow to warm up allowed me to form deep, meaningful connections. It reminded me that every person we meet comes with a reason, a season, or a lifetime lesson.

Why Were We Born?

I want to encourage you today to start your own reflection. Grab a notebook or journal and ask yourself:

• Why do I think I was born?

• What personality traits have always been with me?

• What compliments do I often hear from family, friends, or coworkers?

• How have I made a difference in someone’s life?
  

When I journaled, the most common words that came up about me were: quiet, introverted, compassionate, good listener, helper, sweet, loving, and kind. Writing helped me rediscover who I was and what God intended for me.

Your childhood, your memories —both the painful and the joyful ones —are part of your story. None of it is by accident. God places us in situations for a purpose. Maybe you stood at a bus stop and prevented an accident. Maybe you walked into a hallway at the right moment to stop something terrible from happening. Maybe you encouraged someone who was on the brink of giving up.

Everything in your life is leading you closer to why you were born.

The only way to truly discover it is through Jesus — through daily conversations with Him, prayer, and journaling.

I never thought I would be writing blogs, but here I am. It is part of my journey, which is why I was born. I once hated writing, and now I am an author, coach, and speaker who has been blessed to impact many lives.

Scriptures to Meditate On

• 1 Peter 2:9 – “But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.”

• Colossians 1:16 – “For by Him all things were created that are in heaven and that are on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers. All things were created through Him and for Him.”

• Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

• Jeremiah 32:19 – “You are great in counsel and mighty in work, for Your eyes are open to all the ways of the sons of men, to give everyone according to his ways and according to the fruit of his doings.”

• Proverbs 19:21 – “There are many plans in a man’s heart, nevertheless the Lord’s counsel—that will stand.”

• Hebrews 6:17 – “Thus God, determining to show more abundantly to the heirs of promise the immutability of His counsel, confirmed it by an oath.”

• Proverbs 20:5 – “Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.”

• Psalm 33:11 – “The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart to all generations.”

• Romans 8:28 – “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”

• Ephesians 2:10 – “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.”